Children At Weddings

Last week we looked at the wedding guest list dilemma. This week we’ll consider children at weddings.

Do you already have ideas on whether or not to invite children to your wedding? Hopefully you and your partner agree on the basic principal. There is no right or wrong answer to the question of children at weddings. It’s just a matter of personal preference.

Some prefer to have a child free day. Who wants to have other peoples kids being noisy, unruly and possibly messy? Baby crying during your wedding vows? No thanks! Toddlers climbing over the church pews? No thanks! Sticky fingers on your £1000 wedding gown? Definitely not!

Children at Weddings - child climbing over pew

Children at Weddings - sticky baby

Children at Weddings - baby crying

Others want to include children all the way. It’s a family occasion isn’t it? Children are part of the family aren’t they? Of course! Happy chaos? Yes please! It may be one of the few occasions of the year that the whole family gets together. Extended family is important to you. Marriage is the beginning of your new family tree and everyone comes together to celebrate and see the start of your journey together. You wouldn’t dream of excluding the children!

Children at Weddings - family


Your Rules

The thing is to have a rule – and stick to it. If you want just children of family members there but not friends children then that’s fine. However, don’t let anyone wheedle you into accepting their child/children – you’re sure to upset others who stick to the rules! Given enough time to get organised, quite a few parents relish the thought of a day or two without the responsibility of having their children around. Can’t get a baby sitter? Not your problem – it’s your day to enjoy without worrying about toddler tantrums. Be polite, but firm.

Put a note in your information for guests along perhaps explaining your decision. You may have guest number constraints. Do you just want godchildren there if you don’t have nephews and nieces?

Children at Weddings - pageboy

Children at Weddings - flower girl

If you only want children there who are going to play an active role in the wedding such as pageboy or flower girl then that should also be made clear.


If you are having children at your wedding then consider some entertainment for them. Your vision of your ideal day may include beautifully behaved children smiling and playing nicely. However, some of them might not get the memo!

That’s not to say that if you hire an entertainer of some description that everyone will behave themselves. But you do stand a better chance of a calm and peaceful day.

If a full on entertainer is not in your budget capabilities then a childminding service could be worth investigating. Get organised ahead of time and buy colouring books and water soluble crayons. An arts and crafts table isn’t hard to set up.  Maybe you could organise a treasure hunt around the grounds if the weather is likely to be good.

Food, Drink & Snacks

If there’s going to be a long delay between getting to the reception venue and actually sitting down to eat then it’s a good idea to have some healthy snacks on hand for the children. This will help to avoid hunger meltdowns, making life easier for you and their parents!

Most venues will have a children’s menu – if you’re having lobster, roast quail and a posh pudding then you probably don’t want to pay out for the children to have the same.

Make sure also that there are plenty of drink options for the children. Not all parents will want their kids to have fizzy sugary drinks so something a bit healthier is better. It will also help to minimise the risk of sugar hyperactivity meltdowns!

What are your plans? Include or not include? Leave me a comment or question below 🙂